Friday, June 29, 2007

Pill to make dieters 'feel full'

Pill to make dieters 'feel full'

Great.

Now they just need a pill that makes you quit eating even though you know you're full.

Seriously.

When are they going to develop that?

MILF Weekly Weigh-In

Weight: 155.6 - Down 1.2
Exercise: Gym 2x's avg. 45 minutes each time; Dancing - 1x - 3 hours
Food: 12-1400 calories/day; fat/meal no more than 19 grams

Last Saturday I dropped to 155.6. Yeah the day after the weigh in last Friday. I must have been holding on to some water weight or something. This week I was hoping to see a 4 in my weight. I haven't seen a 4 in so long! But if my pattern hold true I might see a 4 tomorrow morning. Wish me luck!

So far Alli really doesn't seem to have done anything more for me than weight watchers did. I pulled my old paper work from weight watchers, and so far I'm holding true to my pattern of weight loss almost directly to the number. It will be interesting to see what next week holds for me.

Well that's about all I have for this week. Not very exciting...but then again, neither is dieting!

Maybe I'll finally change my workout song for ya for some motivation....

Monday, June 25, 2007

Online Dating

It's the M.I.L.F. thing right? Yeah, probably.

Friday, June 22, 2007

MILF Weekly Weigh-In: My little angry rant filled with profanity.

Weight: 156.8 Down .6---WTF .6?????
Diet: 1200-1400 calories per day with less than 19.6 grams of fat per meal.
Workout: Gym 2x - 1 hour each and at home lifting 45 minutes 1x

OK the Alli experiment is over and I have to say one thing...what a pain in the ass. Not literally as some seem to have become obsessed with, but figuratively. I never had the shitting oil problem. Perhaps because I am 'um following the rules. You know, the basic dieting rules...low fat, balanced diet, etc. If you have the shit's I've decided it's because you're too fucking lazy to do it the right way and you're looking for an easy way out via this pill. You deserve the shits man. But I'm not bitter. No...not at all. You probably lost weight by I don't know, actually eating a vegetable! But me, I struggle--follow the rules--be oh so careful--and do everything anyone has ever told me to do, and I lose fucking .6 pounds! WTF!!!

I guess I'm supposed to be happy with .6 pounds. I guess it's better than nothing. And there were weeks on Weight Watcher's where I only lost .2 and .3 pounds. So I guess I did double my weight loss like Alli promised.

OK, OK, OK...I'll keep going. One more week at least. I was really hoping to average a pound a week, but whatever. Fucking .6 will have to do.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Look at this!

So yesterday I was getting dressed in front of my mirror and I noticed this...

Yeah, it's my arm. But here let me help you...

See that? That's my shoulder muscle. And you can see it! But that's not all...

I have a bicep! It's not a big one. But it's there! See...can you see it?

I don't know what this muscle is but it's bigger isn't it?

I still need to work on this one. But I swear, it doesn't wiggle nearly as much.

What? You're not impressed? Well how about I show you this muscle?

Yeah. You're not messing with me now are ya?


Oh and hey...click on this so I can go to BlogHer '07 OK?



You don't want me to show your the previous shot again now do ya?



Monday, June 18, 2007

Monday, Monday

So I'm sure everybody's wonderin'--did Kelly get the anal leakage from alli? That answer would be no. I already eat a pretty low-fat diet, so according to the warnings I really didn't need to worry. But that didn't stop me from being panicky the whole first day, Saturday. Saturday we had friends to our neighborhood pool for a cookout, and I brought my own meat to grill. Some little kid ate my low-fat dog, and I made the husband make me another one. He was already starting to clean up and said, "Can't you just eat a regular dog?" I shrilly replied, "No! I'm too paranoid about getting the shits!" He looked at me in a way that made me a little uncomfortable.

I guess if you're worried about getting the shits because of the diet you're on that's a bad sign. However, I've decided that since I've already spent the money on the pills, I'm going to ride this through to the end. We'll see what happens. At the very least I'll lose weight because I can't binge eat because my fear of the shits overrides my need to stuff my face with fat. Maybe that's why it works? I don't know.

BTW...Lotta has a good MILF post this week. So...go on over and read it.

And...if you haven't noticed my new workout music section check it out. I'm going to try to change it up often as the mood hits me. Enjoy!

Friday, June 15, 2007

Future MILF: Weekly Weigh-In

Weight: 157.4.....DOWN 1.8! Woohoo!

Diet: 12-1400 caolories per day. However yesterday I ate something that I thought would keep me under my points, but it actually put me over....way over. I hit 2000! Yikes. Oh well, it's raining so it looks like pizza at the pool will be cancelled, so I'll make yesterday my free day. Dang it! I love free day. Especially when I know it's free!

So today I start the alli vs. Wulong experiment and switch to alli. Will keep you posted.

Working out: Lifting twice - 1 1/2 hours. Yeah...that's about it. It did do some gardening, and some hardcore housework that made me sweat. Does that count???lol

Thursday, June 14, 2007

alli vs. the Wulong

As you may remember, I've dropped my calories to 1200-1500 per day since Saturday. And I've been averaging about 13-1400 per day. And, I've been drinking my Wulong tea twice a day after 2 of my main meals. And so far I've lost one pound. Gee I hope I didn't just jinx this by telling you before Friday what I've lost.

Anyway, at about day three I got an advertisement in the mail for alli. To be more precise the cover on the pamphlet said "alli: join the revolution."

Ooooooooooooooo.

I like a good revolution.

So I did a little research. Here's what I found:

"Taken at meal-time, alli works by blocking about 25 per cent of the fat in the food a person eats. Because of the way it works, alli must be used in conjunction with a reduced-calorie, low-fat diet containing about 15 grams of fat per meal. The guides and information supplied in the alli package help the consumer to control the amount of fat in their meals, and to follow an appealing, reduced-calorie, low-fat diet. "

Now there can be some side-effects...

"Users should take a multivitamin once a day, at bedtime, because alli can reduce the absorption of some vitamins."

and

"Consuming a meal with too much fat, while taking alli , can result in bowel changes such as having an urgent need to use the bathroom. These changes, called treatment effects, generally occur in the first weeks of treatment, are not harmful, and can be managed by following the recommended diet with about 15 grams of fat per meal."

But my brochure made it seem less harsh with this simple picture...


OK...not eating too much fat. Hmmmmmm.... Isn't that what a diet is? I don't know. But I have to diet and take your pill? Really?

Anyway, I think this is what I'm going to do.

I'm going to have a little experiment.

I'll finish out my week with the diet and the Wulong (which is supposed to do the same thing). And starting this Saturday, I'll switch over to alli.

Now I know the first week is a little biased as you always lose the most the first week...but this isn't real science now is it?

Aren't you just excited to see which week causes me to lose more weight?

I am! I'd be excited to just lose another pound next week!lol

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Who knew?

Did you know that if you merely drop calories to lose weight you lose fat AND muscle? I didn't know that. I just read it on the manual that came with my new scale. That explains why the "experts" always want you to exercise while dieting. I always thought that the exercise was a suggestion...you know for your heart? For you have to exercise so excessively for it to burn the excessive calories you're eating so why not just eat less? I mean really. Who has time to exercise the amount that it would require to burn off that last candy bar? Really? Who?

No one. So now I read what I read in my manual. Oooooooohhhhhhhh! Light bulb moment. That's why!

They should just say that instead of suggesting that you exercise as part of a healthy life-style. They should say, "Hey! You! Doofas! Yeah you! If you starve yourself you will become weaker. And someday, your tiny little children will be stronger than you and don't you want to be able to beat them in an arm wrestling match until they're at least 14? I mean it's a self-respect thing yo!"

Yeah...that's what they should say.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Basal Metabolic Rate

This weekend I discovered what Basal Metabolic Rate is. Basically it's the amount of calories you'd burn if you stayed in bed all day.

Bed....allll.....day.
Snorrrrrrrrrrrr........
Wha? Wha?
Oh Sorry. I was so distracted by the glorious image of bed all day.

Anyway. I found this calculator that calculates your BMR, tells you how many calories you need to maintain your weight and how many calories you need to eat if you want to lose.

So my BMR is 1475.64 as of this morning.
And my daily caloric intake with my activity level should be 2029.01 calories
And what I need to lose weight is 1529.01 to 1200 calories per day.

So, all of those months I was eating between 1600 and 1800 and I wasn't losing...well that is why! So for two days I aimed for 1200 calories per day and ended up between 1300 and 1400 calories. And this morning I stepped on the scale. Down one pound!

Now it could be the Wulong. But I've been drinking it for a week with no results.

I think it's the diet. We'll see.

Is it just me or is this stuff just fascinating?

Well I'm off to the gym to lift. Well I'm actually off to yell at my kids because I've told them THREE times to get dressed, and they're sitting in front of the TV like zombies because they think I haven't noticed.

So...I'm going to go kick some little kid butt...and then I'm off to the gym.

See you tomorrow!

Friday, June 08, 2007

Future MILF: Weekly Weigh-In - Starting Anew

New Starting Weight: 159.2

My friend Tina says this is why she hates scales. Point two. What's that? Like point two is going to make any difference. When I was doing weight watchers sometimes all I would lose in a week was point 2. And it got me through the week. I think it's actually better if you're a slow loser like myself.

As long as you don't beat yourself up over a point 2 gain. Which really is the problem with weighing period.

Food: OK...I really can't keep up another blog. I haven't posted at the Munchorama in forever. I may take it down. Or maybe I'll leave it up for when the kids are back in school, and I have more time.

Overall the I did well with the food. Until today at lunch. I WAS STARVING! And I was weak. I had buttered white noodles with spinach and tofu.

BUTTERED....WHITE noodles.

Nice. I'll probably gain 5 pounds over the weekend.

Exercise: This week I was complaining to Tina that my biceps are so much weaker than the rest of my body. But then I walked by a trainer who was with a skinny in shape looking girl doing dips. I saw what she was doing and realized, I am so much tougher than I give myself credit for. I am a total bad ass compared to most of the women in here!

A long time ago I used to come home from a sports conditioning class, where we mostly did kick boxing, totally pumped up full of testosterone.

I used to say to my husband, "Wanna wrestle. I can take ya! Do ya? Do ya?"

Yeah.

He could always take me.

But now, now I'm a bad ass.

I think I'm going to go look for the husband. I can totally take 'im!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Tan fat IS better than white fat.

Well I was right.

Tan fat is better than white fat.

And the pool is open, and I am now tan.

And I think I look good...or at least better.

Well at least I thought this way until I got my new scale today.

Yeah, I weigh the same as when I originally started.

Of course this perhaps is the first accurate scale I've had in my house in quite a while...;)

On the gym front:
I haven't talked about the gym in a while. So 3 weeks ago I took a week off from cardio because I just needed a break.

Then I went dancing...in heels...drunk.

Yeah, I sprained my ankle.

Commence the laugh-fest.

Done yet?

No?

OK...just a little more time...

So I took one more week off to heal.

Week 3: The kids both have camp at 9am, and the time causes me not to be able to go to spinning class. So YESTERDAY I finally made it to the gym for some cardio. I crammed it in between dropping off the boy at karate and picking him up 40 minutes later.

One thing I can say for having no time is that it causes to you haul ass on the elliptical.

3 miles in 24 minutes baby!

One other thing I have to say is that the college kids are home.

They have all joined my gym.

I've never seen more young hot guys preening around testosterzone.

It

is

fabulous!

Really.

You should come visit me.

I'll take you to the gym.

Unless you're a guy

And your straight.

Then I've got nothin' for ya.

Sorry.

Go to your own gym.


Oh...one last thing...

Don't worry.

The boobs are not back.

I'm still buff.

I can lift with a sprained ankle.

I'm still all pecks baby!

You know, if that's your thing.





Monday, June 04, 2007

Wulong, Oolong, Could it be wrong?

I am constantly looking for new products to try to benefit my diet and recently have become aware of Wulong (oolong) tea. I have always loved tea, but have had to give it up because of my body's aversion to caffeine. But then I read this article about the tea. In it it states that "oolong tea has half the caffeine of green tea." I was starting to get excited that maybe I had finally found something I could drink. And then I read this...

"
japanese women who consumed oolong tea for 6 weeks and saw a reduction in weight"

and this

"
it involved 11 japanese women who consumed either water, green matcha tea, or oolong tea after a meal. the results were interesting. oolong tea appeared to increase energy expenditure by 10%, green tea by 4%, and water not at all. this means that you burn more fat when you drink oolong or green tea after a meal."

Whadiddy, wha, wha, wha???

Yeah...I'm totally in. So I ordered some.
After I ordered it I read this in the comments:

"I have been drinking oolong tea at least 4-6 cups per day during the past holiday season, with meal or anytime I want to eat snack... To my delight, the pant size is drop one whole size!"

Cross your fingers people!

I'll keep you updated.

Well as soon as my scale arrives.

Oh...and it tastes really good too. But I seem to be having the same sleep issues that I have when I drink caffeine. Maybe I'll stop drinking it by noon.

Unless I drop a whole pant size.

You know...I'm not completely crazy.






Sunday, June 03, 2007

No really...


People look at my oh so white son shivering at the pool and say,
"Little B is so skinny! Who did he get that from?"

"Me." I say, "No really, I used to look like that. Really. I did."